My LiveJournal

5:46pm: Updating?
So, i haven't written in this in awhile.

Been pretty busy with volunteering and such, life in general really.

And life's been hitting me pretty hard lately.

I had yet another person in my life die recently...
So, that's 6 in the past 5 years, and it's hard, ya know?
I just don't know what i'm supposed to do.

I get close to someone and the next day, they're gone.

*sigh*

....

So, i've been dealing with that pretty well, but i don't think i could handle another funeral.
It doesn't seem right, ya know?

It's all kinda...surreal.

I don't know, i'm talking nonsense.

Anyway, on a semi-brighter note, i attempted to make dinner last night, and failed miserably.

And i mean miserably.

I ended up setting the smoke detectors off and burning my finger in the process.

So everyone was pretty reluctant to let me back into the kitchen tonight, but i did pretty good.

Although, i only made hamburger helper, so it wasn't that hard lol.
Anyway, i'm off to...wander or something.

4:03pm: A little off, i guess you could say.
I'm not too sure how i'm feeling today, exactly, but it's on the good side.

It's my little sisters birthday.
My mom and i were teasing her about her presents for weeks, telling her that we weren't getting her anything, and asking her when her birthday was(for the hundreth time).
It was fun torturing her.
We did it up until today, and she believed us. until we actually gave her the presents and cake and such.

So she should be a happy little camper now.

My birthdays next month. and i know it's ridiculous to say, but i'm starting to feel old.
I'll only be 20.
What a sad thing that is.

My bf keeps bugging me about what i want to do, and i keep telling her "i don't plan that far ahead."
She'll be lucky if i decide what i want to do the day of.
If i even remember, that is.

Sad, but true, i have a tendency to forget such things.

This "old friend" i have keeps calling me, every day, at least 4 times a day, and it's driving me insane.

I think he expects me to be home all day, waiting for his call, and not have a social life outside of his friendship. Seriously.

He knows my house phone and cell phone, and this may sound bad, but sometimes i just don't answer it cause i get so tired of him.

All he wants to do is be stuck in the past and remember all the "good times" we had.
And i'm so over that.

But anyway, i have to be going. <3

5:01pm: I feel like i may just puke...
So, me and my lil sis decided it'd be fun to make our own homemade pizza and some breadsticks.

Bad idea.

Not only are we the worst cooks ever, but we also decided to make the rest of our family and friends miserable also, by making them eat it too.

Okay, so maybe it wasn't that bad, but i ate more than i should have (to defend my cooking pride of course) and now i feel like i'm going to throw up.

It's not the most fun feeling.

Now i've went into hiding, so everyone else won't attack me.

The trust really goes out of a relationship when you literally make them sick.

So, on the bright side, i'm sure no one will ever trust us in the kitchen again, to save us from ourselves(and everyone else).

Anyway, i have to make a few phone calls and such, so bye for now.

10:06pm: "Everything i learned about breaking hearts, i learned from you..."
So, todays been much of the same.
I turned in my app. for some other volunteering i want to do, so that's good.
Hope i hear back from them soon.
I'm really excited about it.
More excited then i thought i was going to be, but it's something i've wanted to do like, my entire life.

Watched Alias. I'm so disgustingly obsessed with that show...
They need some sort of rehab for it.
I could probebly start one of my own...

Anyway, my s.o. was extremely distracted today, which in turn, distracted(and annoyed)the hell out of me.

He has a few issues he seems to be dealing with, although he seems to not want to get into it with me, for whatever reason.

Which is okay, cause god knows, i've kept tons of shit from him, in the past.

Hopefully he'll come around, so i can quit being so obsessive about it.

Moving on...

Me and my bf went shopping today for some appliances and such.

Last time we did that, it was because we blew up the toaster and the microwave.
In like, the same day.

But this time it's for some friends, moving out on their own, and need all the help they can get.

Not sure what's going on this weekend,plans always seem to change at the last minute.
And god forbid i have any control over what i'm doing.

Anyway, friends coming over, gotta go.

6:31am: So very lost...
So, there's all these nifty little things you can do on here, but i'm kinda confused as to how i should go about doing them...

I'm still not quite sure what the hell i'm doing but...that's normal for me.

Anyway, i'm up early, doing some more cleaning and such.

My mother is coming to my rescue and bringing over some much needed caffiene.

My body's still pretty achey from yesterday, and i really didn't get that much sleep last night.

I was being kept up by my S.O. (on the phone) and my bf (in my bed) and it was absolute torture.

And i haven't been thinking much about my pets(dog and cat) but i was thinking about them last night, and how this move is going to affect them, and i felt kinda bad.

But anyway, things are really good right now, i just pray they stay that way.

I'm thinking about doing something drastic with my hair.
It's time for some change.

And this weekend is coming up so fast, i'm just happy i'll finally be getting a break.

We're gonna go out to some clubs, maybe a couple parties,i don't know, but i have this strong urge to dance, so hopefully i will this weekend.

Well, i'm off.

7:31pm: How about that...
So, i've decided to write a quick entry before i head off to bed.

I woke up way too early this morning, and was cleaning and moving furniture all day, so my poor little body is just exhausted.

My best friend, who knows all my little buttons to push, has been testing her limits all day, annoying the hell out of me.

And i've been best friends with her for 8 years now and i love her to death, but sometimes i just want to tell her to fuck off.

Of course, i understand her reasoning behind it all, so it makes it harder.

She's also my roomate and i'm in the process of moving to another place(3 hours away) so she's a little upset. I'd react the same way.

But i'll still see her everyday. Moving three hours away is not going to seperate us lol.

But she also has a problem with my new boyfriend. And it pisses her off that she can't find any flaws in him(yet). She still finds a reason to bitch, of course.

But in better news : I'm happy. I'm happier than i've been in such a long time.
And it feels really good.
I finally found someone (besides my best friends) who makes me outrageously happy.
I mean, tom cruise and katie holmes happy lol.
well, maybe not so much like them...

And we're not taking things too serious or too fast.
I had enough of that in the past to know it never works out.
Anyway, i'm off to bed.